How do you spell PHEW!?

PHEW! That’s how. 

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IMG_7631You know the word you say when you almost got hit in the head with a softball at the game last night, but it grazed by the side of your beautiful head? Breezing through your golden locks. PHEW!

Or…the sound you make when you were just about to graze the side of that fence with your car and at the last mili-second, you stopped. And pondered: “What the heck told me to stop right then?!” PHEW!

Or…you slowed down on the freeway just in time to see a police officer. Or you decided NOT to fly through that yellow light as the car in front of you gets caught on camera. PHEW!

img_8873Or…when you make it to the top of that glorious hike. The view and the sweat are worth the steps and pain! PHEW! 

Or…(ok, one more) Or…the moment you pop the question to the love of your life and she says, “HELL YES!” PHEW!

What is your PHEW! moment?

Phew literally has a definition! I didn’t know.

Phew means: “to express a strong reaction or relief.

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As you read in my last blog, It Truly IS,  I put my stud of a dog, NEO, down in April. It truly was the hardest time in my life to date. And writing this wonderful blog was the last thing I had the strength to do. I thank you, for those who recently started following me, for understanding, as a writer, or as a human, the need to take care of ones self and not force the flow.”

“You can’t force the flow. I want it to be my inner most creation built on the precipice of movement. Not crammed within the lines of expectations.” –Muthle Fiberths

 

IMG_6573I also want to share about the (excuse my language here) “Mind Fuck” grief is. I am a therapist, as most of you know. I have been trained in grief. I studied grief in grad school. I work with Marines, and military who have experienced grief more than the average person could understand. However, until you experience it for yourself, it is a crazy, hard, confusing experience. Have some grace on yourself if you are going through it now. And look for guidance as you let the process happen.

My PHEW!.. (insert here.) 🙂 PHEW! I made it to OCTOBER! I made it through this challenging year of loss and gain. The yin and yang, right?

Here is another PHEW! for me:  I landed my first teaching job! I am so excited to share with my Still Playin’ With It Tribe: I have been hired to teach Positive Psychology at a university! Aw, people! Just follow your dream. Wiggle your way in. Even if you don’t think you have what it takes or the experience, trust yourself. Be resourceful. Pray. Leap. WHATEVER it takes so you can have your, PHEW! I nailed it! moment! Because you deserve to live the life you want to create! (I share, too, as a root to the reason I may not write as often in the next few months as I flow into this new season…)

every-journey-starts-with-one-stepSssssshhh…Hear that? It’s the voice in YOUR soul. It’s gently whispering. Waiting for you to find the strength or courage to make a small step forward towards that dream of YOURS!

And, ONCE, you make that FIRST step…you can say:

“PHEW!!!! I DID IT!”

YOU did. No one else but YOU! Now! Go! Create that PHEW!

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“EITHER WRITE SOMETHING WORTH READING OR DO SOMETHING WORTH WRITING.”-BENJAMIN FRANKLIN

Mosaic

“Life is like riding a bicycle.

To keep your balance you must keep moving.”

Albert Einstein

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It has been two weeks since I have written. This is the longest stretch I have had since starting Still Playin’ With It almost a year ago. The past month has brought a tremendous amount of change to my life. As you have all read, and experience with me, I have ventured through Licensure for Marriage and Family Therapy (LMFT). I started my private practice, which is an amazing tale of courage (link to Perfectly Rebecca). As well, I took a solo trip to Bali for 18 days. (Link to Bali Dreams and Look What I Found: stories of Bali.) I have also been to Oregon and Austin since December. So, this Rebecca has been busy, to say the least.

From licensure, to Bali, and every state of the U.S. and of my mind, I have grappled with what is. Whenimages (1) writing, we have a tendency to discover answers that otherwise may be lost in the soup of our meshed neural pathways in our skull. Trying to make sense of an experience or feeling, our brains tell us reasons why we feel the way we do.

For example: You feel anxious. Your brain says: “There has GOT to be a reason for this and I am going to tell you why.” Then it berates you with multiple reasons why, (these things that you really weren’t thinking of in the first place) are now firing through your mind increasing your anxiety. From your laundry list to your bullying experience as a child, they all may rise in the midst of this feeling. Maybe your parents are getting older or you didn’t say the “right” thing the night before to your partner. It literally will fire all of this at you at once till you grab on to what it MUST be. Then you deal with it while creating more negative energy around this anxious feeling.homeresonance375

Lovely, Rebecca. What the hell do I do with this then? I tell you Still Playin’ With It PEOPLE! I tell you NOW! You stop. You look on the feeling with curiosity and allow yourself to be present in the feeling while it passes, because it will. Then you call your parents, hug your spouse and go for a run. I know it sounds simple, but guess what? It really can be that simple.

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In Winner Winner Chicken Dinner I talked about Newton and the Law of Motion. Like the quote above from Einstein, we must keep moving forward! Not only to stay in motion, but also to KEEP OUR BALANCE! How many times do we talk about balance in our lives? Balancing career and family. Balancing all the different aspects of our selves. I speak a lot to my clients on the integration of our “selves” in therapy. We are fragmented souls. Fragmented in a way that suggests that there is a balance of our pieces. Not fragmented as in BROKEN. Got that?

Your fragments could be from different eras in your life, relationships, experiences, and upbringing.0-PRwyuP2F-mosaic-20course-s- Regardless of your belief in the above theory on fragmentation, our lives can be felt as more balanced when we step into the reintegration of these parts. Take a moment right now. Close your eyes. Imagine, like a beautiful mosaic, your parts coming together to form a tight, gorgeous, perfectly connected masterpiece. That is you: a timeless piece of art. Thank you to those that have trusted me in this process of reintegration in my practice. It has been amazing and a true honor. You know who you are. I love you all.

Today, I will leave you all with this. Recently I took a job as an MFLC: Military Family Life Counselor at Camp Pendleton. I am “embedded” in a battalion. I serve as a therapist and additional support to the marines and sailors of this unit.  As you know from reading me, I am a proud supporter of the military. If you haven’t, PLEASE read “Service”!  This blog is a true reflection of my thoughts with the dedication of our service members. IMG_0792

I committed in the writing of Service, and to my father, that I would serve back in my career for at least a year. Well, guess what? I am doing it! This is my platform to give back to the thousands of men and women, past and present, that have sacrificed and given their all. Last week I was honored with the opportunity to go on the battalion hump. A measly four mile hike through the green hills of Camp Pendleton.

The CULMINATION of the past 5 years of my life, experiencing what I created. I CREATED by a dream: a.k.a FOLLOWING MY BLISS!IMG_7304

p.s. My heart also BELONGS TO MOMMY! I love you mom. Thank you for your undying support and loving me through this amazing process of reintegration and the discovery of my true self! I wouldn’t be who, or where I am today with out you. I love you, Mom.

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“Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing.” Benjamin Franklin

DIG DEEP PEEPS

“What would you do TODAY if you had no fear?” -Rebecca Laser

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It’s a dichotomous
life we live at times, isn’t it? Like a leprechaun in search for her pot of gold. Endlessly hunting in turmoil for the end of that rainbow that “they” say you can never find! On a continuous quest to find that bloody treasure, we toil the land, look under places we never thought we could. Coming up with nothing many times, or at least it feels like nothing. Then the bells ring. The whistles blast and the glitter falls from the sky: JACKPOT!

Dear Still Playin’ With It Family…YOU CAN leprechaun1FIND YOUR POT OF GOLD! Even if it is at the end of a rainbow in which the world tells you doesn’t exist. Don’t believe that B.S. Your dreams DO exist. Your goals are achievable. Your BLISS is to be called out. This is where the belief in YOU and YOUR power exists.

It would be so easy at that point to stop. Resistance of the worlds beliefs derails you and your dreams. Aw, the life of the acting world. Do you think Matt Damon and Ben Affleck fell for this crap at some point? Probably. Why keep moving forward when STOP signs keep you blocked? Because (Doc S, JD, and RC) there is a pot of fucking gold to be found! It is your bliss…keep moving forward. Don’t buy in to the misleading guidance of the fearful insinuating that there is no rainbows end. Instead, create it! I am so proud of you.

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My friend in LA was chatting with me about a writing job she has. (Oregon girl) She had some fear of how it would turn out, almost not putting the hope or expectation into what may or may not happen. Forget THAT! In If You Build It, I mentioned FEAR being:

False

Evidence

Appearing

Real

imagesShe was focusing on the fear of what MAY happen. Per the Universal Law of Attraction: what we think about, we bring about. So, I challenged her with this:

“Imagine what it would FEEL like to go ALL THE WAY and FOCUS ON THAT!” She said that made her smile just to think about. Hmm? To believe in one’s self?! To BELIEVE in the ability of one’s gifts, dreams, and bliss? What a concept! What would it FEEL like to pass that test? Land that acting gig/writing job? Be pain free? OR get a “W”?!!!

The San Diego Chargers, despite their athletic talent, lost to Miami with a big fat goose egg last week. This is a perfect example of the mind game. Where athletes are fighting a bigger battle: Their mind…or too much partying in South Beach. I am going to go with the first. Phillip Rivers, the QB, has a tremendous amount of athletic ability and talent. To get “W“s you have got to have more. You must have the mind-strength, belief and intention to get those “W“‘s. Combined with a TEAM to support you. (Give me a call, Phil. I will help you get more “W”s.)san-diego-chargers-quarterback-philip-rivers

Setting an intention or goal to WIN is what brings the “W” to life. Eliminate the “What If’s” or “What Mays” by combining “What Is” with the belief.  Belief in the outcome you are envisioning is what creates those accomplishments. In Bump, SET, Spike! I talk about the POWER of setting an intention! Check it.

Life lesson: Small steps lead to GREAT and significant accomplishments! Even in the midst of fear, take a step. I talked about this in Just Do It, my video from two weeks ago. If you have something you want to accomplish, take a small step, or think about what you Do Do (link to Do Do or Doo-Doo, one of my favorite blogs) and NOT what you don’t! (cough! Preaching to the choir!) Was there something you set out to accomplish this week that felt insignificant, yet for you was a victory? Celebrate that! I celebrate YOU!

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THE THREE STEPS TO A “W”

1. BELIEVE

2. SET IT AND FORGET IT

3. HAVE A KICK ASS TEAM 

 

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What do you wanna get a “W” in this week? Do you have your heart set on this WIN? And do you have a team to support you? THEN TAKE A STEP and KICK ASS! 

 

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“Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing.” -Benjamin Franklin